Ask the mother of 14 continued

Question: I am just weeks from delivering our third child. The others are almost 4 and just turned 2. I don't have much help from others. To be honest I feel alittle bitter at the church because very few even ask if I could use help or a break. My father died 15 years ago and my mom has Alzheimer's, my father in law died 5 years ago and my mother in law is 82. We just don't have family around to help.Did you have help from family or church when you were starting out.... the first 4 or 5 kids?Another bit I would love from you is ..... a couple of recipe favorites.Oh.. what church do you go to?

Answer: I never had help either. My mom would come for the delivery ( I had c-sections remember) but would always leave before I was even out of the hospital. She did not live in the same state and worked then. My husband would take only the days off while I was in the hospital. I was on my own. We did have church friends, but since we live an hour away from where we went to church- no help there.( a non-denominational church) A few times the ladies would bring out a meal or two.

I learned to freeze meals before. So all we had to do was take it out in the morning to thaw. Then pop it in the oven to bake. I would freeze rolls ahead, and do the same thing. We might add a canned or frozen veggie some meals. That got me through the first few months. It was still home-made food and you can't tell the difference.

I know it is hard to not have help. It was hard for me too. But there was nothing I could do about it. Getting upset only made it worse for ME. So I just decided to make a way to get things done myself- and I did. It paid off. I love having all these kids! May you find a place of peace in your heart about your situation. And CONGRATULATIONS on expecting a new baby soon!! I am green with envy! Hugs, Barbara

Question: ok, its me again, forgive me if this was already asked. how do you keep your house clean???? I assume everyone has chores, but that in itself its work to supervise!

Answer: Yes, everyone has chores. They are on a chart. Each person knows what to do- and they do it. We do a quick pick up each evening too. The only thing I have to say is, "Time to do your chores children" and they go. If you do a LOT of training while they are small then you have to do little else once they are big. ;)They KNOW mama means what she says- so mama don't have to say much! LOL!

I hear a lot from mom's about kids not listening. Ladies- grow a spine! A marine sargent can take a huge group of 18 and 19 year olds and whip them into shape in a week! In a day they are "yes Sir" "No Sir", making beds, peeling potatoes, scubbing floors, doing anything asked of them. Are they beaten into submission? no. A drill instructor does not "ask" them to do things. He "tells" them and EXPECTS they will obey.

Most mom's figure they won't obey and so they get kids that don't.You don't have to yell like your in the Marines- you are a lady AND have God's authority. But you DO have to mean what you say! A kid knows the difference. They also know how far they can go before they hit your "This is final" order.Make the FIRST time the final order! Saves time and energy!! Hugs, Barbara

PS-One more thing on the house. Have things done right away. Dishes need washed after each meal. Don't let anything like that build up! Do laundry daily. It takes much less brain time to keep it done, than to have to do a huge mountain all in one day! And the house looks better all week!

Question: I do, I do!!! Did you ever try to select the sex of any of your babies? Meaning did you do anything to select for better odds of having a boy or girl by doing anything and DID it work? Thanks in advance!

Answer: We never did anything. We just took what God gave us! LOL! Mine are (remeber I did not give birth to the first):G,G,B,B,B,B,B,B,G,G,B,G,G ( and one we miscarried too small to tell- get to find out once we get to heaven!)I have heard there are things you can do to make girls or boys, but don't know what they are. HAHA! I DO know the twins were conceived at the same time ;) and they are one Boy, one Girl. Hugs, Barbara